


kiss me craig tucker

by proboscis



Category: South Park
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-30
Updated: 2016-12-30
Packaged: 2018-09-13 08:50:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9115813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/proboscis/pseuds/proboscis
Summary: clyde is determined to get a kiss from his best friend





	

Craig’s earliest memory - if it can be called that - is moving to South Park. It’s vague, just blurs of moving vans, empty floors, “are we there YET?“s, and boxes everywhere.

  
And, of course, he remembers meeting the neighbors clear as day. The Donovan’s lived across the street, and they had a kid exactly Craig’s age. "A little boy, just like you!” his mom exclaimed, way more excited than Craig was. She waved goodbye and dropped him off at the door, telling him to have fun.

  
He didn’t see why he had to hang out with Clyde, who seemed too loud and hyperactive for Craig’s taste. How was it possible to have fun, when Clyde bounced off the walls, tripped over his own feet and cried when he did, and hopped from activity to activity before Craig could even get started? Because after a few minutes of playing in the sandbox it was off to the swings, and then, “Do you like coloring? I have the coolest markers, they all smell like candy,” And Clyde led Craig to his room. He took out a box full of paper and crayons, and dumped it on the floor.

  
Craig took a box of crayons, and a coloring page with two puppies on it. “You shouldn’t sniff markers. You’ll get brain tumors and it… explodes your head,” Craig says. His dad had told him that, one time, when Craig kept sniffing sharpies at the dollar store.

  
“Well, I’m super tough, so I won’t ever ‘splode,” Clyde says proudly, puffing out his chest, “And - if you die, I’ll give you a kiss and bring you back to life, like in the movies!”

  
“Gross,” Craig mumbles, “that’ll give me your germs.”

  
Clyde pouts, tears forming in his eyes. “I - I don’t have germs! Don’t be so mean… I won’t let you color with me anymore!” he sobs, starting to put the materials back into the box.

  
Craig didn’t mean to hurt Clyde’s feelings; he didn’t even know he was being mean. He didn’t want to lose the only kind of friend he had… Even if Clyde acted annoying, sometimes, Craig liked having company his age for once. Besides, Clyde said funny stuff, sometimes.

  
So he reached over and wiped Clyde’s face with his sweater sleeve. “I’m sorry for being mean. You can kiss me if you want. You probably don’t have germs, and even if you do, it’s okay, because we’re both boys. Boys have the same germs.” He keeps wiping Clyde face until it’s dry. It takes a while, because Clyde starts crying more after Craig apologizes. Maybe it wasn’t a very good apology, Craig thinks, or maybe Clyde is just pulling out the waterworks to make him feel bad.

  
Clyde sniffs, “Then, let me kiss you right now! So I can prove I don’t have any germs.”

  
Craig tilts his head, “But… I’m not dead. You can’t kiss me if I’m not dead! It won’t do anything.”

  
Clyde pouts. “Ah - shoots! You’re right… but if you die, tell me, okay?! ‘Cause, I’ll totally give you the most best awesome kiss, and you’ll be like ‘dang, Clyde’s so cool!’ and you’ll be happy forever after with me, in the sunset and stuff!”

  
Craig thinks that Clyde’s been watching too many girly fairy tale movies, and he tells the other boy this. Which… just leads Clyde into more tears, and Craig into more attempts at comforting words. After that, though, the boys do manage to start a drawing together.

  
Clyde draws himself and Craig, and Craig provides a space background - “My dad says that space is the biggest thing, ever. Like, you can’t ever see it all, because it’s so big. But one day, I’m gonna be a spaceman and I’ll see everything!”

  
Clyde also adds in aliens, and then Craig and Clyde are fighting aliens in space, which leads to Craig pretending to be an evil alien who’s attacking Clyde, and. Well.

  
It’s a lot more fun than Craig thought he’d have with Clyde, and he’s sad when his mom comes to pick him up. Clyde is so sad he cries, again, and is only comforted when he’s assured that Craig will come over again tomorrow.

  
Clyde smiling, nose still dripping and face still red from crying, is a face that Craig’s never been able to forget. It still makes him smile when he looks back on it.

  
They’ve changed a lot. Clyde doesn’t cry all the time, and Craig doesn’t really enjoy space aliens as much as he did at five years old. But one thing that’s remained constant is the friendship they built. And Clyde’s awful attempts at trying to get kisses, but that’s a whole other can of worms.

**Author's Note:**

> i posted this thinking i was going to add more to it but then i never did! :-P but i hope you enjoyed this, even though it's very short.


End file.
